To the parents of the child we called the police on, I’m sorry we pissed you off. I’m sorry you were annoyed, aggravated, embarrassed or put out. I am NOT, however, sorry I called. You child put out a cry for help, and I answered.
This is what they said:
“I’m done. Bye. I’m leaving. I’m sitting in my room, crying. I’m so f’ing lost. My head is killing me. My nose is bleeding. I don’t know where I am. I feel numb. I feel nothing. Nothing matters anymore. I’m done with everything. I’m alone. I don’t care anymore”
When my daughter called out to me for guidance, she said- “Mom, we have to get help. I’m scared for them. This is not right. They are alone. We need to call for help”. I agreed. We called for help for your child, because what they were saying was a huge cry-no, a scream for help and maybe we were the only ones hearing it.
Your child said they were alone. We acted . Later, when the police had left, your child asked my child WHY she would call the police on them, she said:
“I was scared for you. I care about you. I’d rather you be mad at me than be dead. You needed more help than I can give you.”
This month in Connecticut we have lost 2 teenagers ( that I know of) to suicide. What if someone read Bart Palosz’ posts on Google+ and acted on them? What if someone heard his cry for help, and answered? Maybe he’d still be alive. What if the young girl who died in Shelton texted someone before she hanged herself, and they called for help? Perhaps she’s still be alive. When my own child gave out a cry for help, I am forever thankful to the few of her friends who texted me, called me, Facebooked me and told me to go, RIGHT NOW, and talk to to her. I’d like to think that if I didn’t answer, they would call someone, ANYONE else for help.
Having a child in crisis is not a reason to be embarrassed or annoyed. Having a child in crisis is a reason to be thankful– because they are still here and you have the chance to help them. I cannot pretend to understand this problem, the trend of teenagers killing themselves. I do not understand the reasoning that “ending it all” is a viable option- and why they cannot see past the NOW to the FUTURE. I can’t wrap my head around suicide is the 3rd leading cause of death for teenagers in this country. I can’t fathom why they are giving up on themselves. But I know it’s a real problem. We owe it to children, ALL children, not just our own, to listen and to be there for them. And to let our children know it’s ok to come to us if they think something is wrong with one of their friends. Olivia Penpraze’s friends did not, and she killed herself.
A bad decision can be made in a heartbeat. A worse decision will stop one.
So you can be angry that we called the police on your child. But we would do it again, in a heartbeat. And we’re glad your child is ok.