This weekend, I took my daughter shopping for a new outfit,and I had a little flashback of shopping as an overweight teenager.
SHOPPING REALLY SUCKS WHEN YOU ARE FAT.
I watched her try on outfit after outfit and not be happy. I watched her eyes well up with tears and her try to hide it. I watched her be disappointed over and over. All she wanted was a cool outfit that made her feel good and look good. She told me that when she can’t find clothes that she wants she feels badly about herself sometimes.
I remember that feeling. I remember feeling like crap that NOTHING fit right, or made me feel good. I remember having to shop in the older lady department. And I HATED it. For me, it really reinforced my feelings of self worthlessness. And now that I’m grown, finding nicer plus sized clothes is easier, but is it because I’m older, and have an older sense of style? Is it because I’ve learned to love myself? That my self worth isn’t dependent upon what size I wear? That what I look like isn’t the sum of what people think about me? Because sometimes I don’t feel that way,and my size defines how happy or sad I am. I still have to fight those demons.
Do your clothes and the way you dress define how you feel?